Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Through the Keyhole - March 2017

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guess the location
     MARCH 2017 turnkey-color-logo-white 7
Through the Keyhole

Informative & Interesting... not your everyday company newsletter.
It's March - Happy New Year, ancient Romans!

Welcome to the third month of the year—or, if you were born before 150 B.C., the first! According to the oldest Roman calendars, one year was ten months long, beginning in March and ending in December. It may sound crazy, but you can still see traces of this old system in our modern calendar: because December was the tenth month, it was named for the number ten in Latin (decem), just like September was named for seven (septem). So, what about January and February? They were just two nameless months called “winter,” proving that winter is literally so awful it doesn’t even deserve a spot on the calendar.

March Madness is also this month and my office has its infamous office pool (don't tell the cops) whereby we all guess our way to a busted bracket or two...March Madness also marks the time where the number of vasectomies surges by 50 percent as the first weekend boast just about 4 complete days of basketball on the couch.

March is also a great month to begin warring... March was actually named for the Latin Martius—aka Mars, the Roman God of war and a mythical ancestor of the Roman people via his wolf-suckling sons, Romulus and Remus. With the winter frosts melting and the ground becoming fertile for harvest again in the Northern hemisphere, March was historically the perfect month for both farmers to resume farming, and warriors to resume warring.

Romulus and Remus statues are all over Siena (in Tuscany), Italy

Recent history confirms that with the exception of Afghanistan (October 2001), all major US-NATO led military operations over a period of almost half a century –since the invasion of Vietnam by US ground forces on March 8, 1965– have been initiated in the month of March.

The Vietnam War
The US Congress adopted the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution, which authorized President Lyndon Johnson to dispatch ground forces to Vietnam on March 8, 1965.

NATO’s war on Yugoslavia was launched on March 24, 1999. 

The Iraq War
The War on Iraq was launched on March 20, 2003. (Baghdad time)

(The 1991 Gulf War on Iraq began on 17th January. However, after the 28th February ceasefire was agreed and signed – following the Basra Road massacre of withdrawing soldiers and fleeing civilians on 26th/27th February – the US 24th Mechanised Infantry Division slaughtered thousands on 2nd March.“)

The Covert War on Syria
The US-NATO Covert War on Syria was initiated on March 15, 2011 with the incursion of Islamist mercenaries and death squads in the southern city of Daraa on the border with Jordan.

NATO’s “Humanitarian” R2P War on Libya
NATO commenced its bombing of Libya on March 19, 2011.  Libya was bombed relentlessly by NATO warplanes starting on March 19, 2011 for a period of approximately seven months.


And now for a new picture above- Can you guess where it is by looking through the keyhole?  "This 5 mile stretch of cliffs has served as a viewing point for hundreds of years. On a clear day you can see Twelve Pins and the Dingle Peninsula. It is a must stop when touring this green country." Can you guess the location?

Correct answers will be given recognition but half the fun is trying to figure it out.  The correct answer will be revealed in the subsequent issue.  Good luck and have fun.

If you like this newsletter, forward it to someone else or sign them up HERE.

As always, send any items you think are newsworthy, interesting or just plain odd to news@turnkey.pro

Paris, France - Keyhole Answer

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"When a couple travels to this famous bridge in the city of love, they lock a padlock with their initials onto the public fence and throw away the key.  In 2015, all locks were removed."

Last month, Penny Moen won the location by guessing correctly.  She correctly said "the lock and keys is in the city of Paris and it is the Pont des Art Bridge railing."  Great knowledge of romantic Parisian landmarks.

Paris is often referred to as "The City of Light" (La Ville Lumière), both because of its leading role during the Age of Enlightenment, and more literally because Paris was one of the first European cities to adopt gas street lighting.

The city of Paris (also called the Commune or Department of Paris) had a population of 2,241,346 people within its administrative city limits as of January 1, 2014. It is surrounded by the Paris unité urbaine, or urban area, the most populous urban area in the European Union.

Paris is famous for being a global fashion hub, and it is also known for its world-renowned cuisine. Paris is also famous for many of its attractions, including the Eiffel Tower, Notre Dame, The Louvre and Moulin Rouge.

Paris is called the "City of Love" for a number of reasons, including its sights, its native language and its popularity as a honeymoon destination. Although other cities sometimes claim the same moniker, Paris earns its name as a place where romance blossoms.

Don't leave Paris without trying...
  • Baguette. It is safe to say that Paris is the place on Earth with the highest density of top-quality, artisanal baguettes. ...
  • Steak-frites. ...
  • Croque-monsieur. ...
  • Duck confit. ...
  • Jambon-beurre. ...
  • Raw-milk artisanal cheeses. ...
  • Croissant. ...
  • Paris-Brest.
French Culture. The French are very proud when it comes to their cuisine. France is well-known throughout the world for its culinary arts. Amateurs and professionals flock to France, and particularly Paris, to study and experience food at its finest—gastronomie en France.


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Photo of the Month
This photo was taken February 14th by Indira Lopez of the Pacific Ocean near Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.

Taxes and Children


Strictly Mathematics
This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. Experience.
It has an indisputable mathematical logic.
It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
This is a strictly .....  Mathematical viewpoint.. And it goes like this:

What Makes 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:


Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But ,

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%


2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty, that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there.
Its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top. 

Now you know why some people are where they are today!

Fake "Mad Dog" Mattis Quote of the week
"Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night.  Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

Parenting Memes
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This Happened.
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In mid February, I attended a function where essentially a canary provided some of the entertainment.  The canary would be told your name and then it would choose a fortune from a box of many possibilities.  All of the fortunes that people around me received were very verbose, hard to read and generally vague.  However, mine was short, quirky and to the point.

Although I am not sure what "unleash your inner unicorn" means, I think it could mean something different to each one of us.  I had a very good laugh upon returning home after a very colorful evening.  Look for a unicorn promotion soon... or maybe a clothing line, a self help book or diet plan.

This story has legs (and a horn and a rainbow)...

Flying during the 30s and 40s
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If You Thought Air Travel Was Luxurious In The 1970s, 
Check Out What It Was Like Aboard The WW2-Era Boeing Clipper

Clipper passengers took their meals at real tables, not their seats.

For most travelers in the 21st century, flying is a dreary experience, full of inconvenience, indignity, and discomfort. That wasn't the case in the late 1930s, when those with the money to afford trans-oceanic flight got to take the Boeing Model 314, better known as the Clipper.

Even Franklin Roosevelt used the plane, celebrating his 61st birthday on board.
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Between 1938 and 1941, Boeing built 12 of the jumbo planes for Pan American World Airways.

The 314 offered a range of 3,500 miles — enough to cross either the Atlantic or Pacific —and room for 74 passengers onboard. Of course, modern aviation offers an amazing first class experience (and it's a whole lot safer), but nothing in the air today matches the romanticism of crossing the ocean in the famed Clipper.

The Model 314's nickname Clipper came from an especially fast type of sailing ship used in the 19th century.

The ship analogy was appropriate, as the Clipper landed on the water, not runways.

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On Pan Am flights, passengers had access to dressing rooms and a dining salon that could be converted into a lounge or bridal suite.

The galley served up meals catered from four-star hotels. If you want to sit at a table to eat with other people these days, you have to fly in a private jet.  There was room for a crew of 10 to serve as many as 74 passengers.
On overnight flights, the 74 seats could be turned into 40 bunks for comfortable sleeping.
The bunk beds came with curtains for privacy.

On the 24-hour flights across the Atlantic, crew members could conk out on these less luxurious cots.

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Unlike some modern jets that come with joysticks, the Clipper had controls that resembled car steering wheels.

Navigating across the ocean used to require more manpower in the air.

The lavatory wasn't too fancy, but it did have a urinal — something you never see in today's commercial jets, where space is at a premium.

The ladies lounge had stools where female passengers could sit and do their makeup.

The Clipper made its maiden trans-Atlantic voyage on June 28, 1939. But once the US entered World War II, the Clipper was pressed into service to transport materials and personnel.

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Normandy Beach Art.
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A large percentage of our country doesn't know of or care about Normandy.

In 2013, British artist Jamie, accompanied by numerous volunteers,took to the beaches of Normandy with rakes and stencils in hand to etch 9,000 silhouettes representing fallen people into the sand.

Titled The Fallen 9000, the piece is meant as a stark visual reminder of those who died during the D-Day beach landings at Arromanches on June 6th, 1944 during WWII.

The original team consisted of 60 volunteers, but as word spread nearly 500 additional local residents arrived to help with the temporary installation that lasted only a few hours before being washed away by the tide.
9,000 Fallen Soldiers Etched into the Sand on Normandy Beach to Commemorate Peace Day.

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watch it made here (video)

How The Fight Started...

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift
The next year, I didn't buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
"Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"
And that's how the fight started.....

My wife was at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunk swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed, he's my old boyfriend. He began drinking right after we split up years ago, and hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"
And then the fight started...

When our lawn mower broke my wife kept nagging me to get it fixed. But, I always had something else to take care of. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
I found her seated in the tall, unmowed grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Lots of dust."
And then the fight started...

My wife was standing naked, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
"I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."
That's when the fight began ....

I rear-ended a car this morning ... the start of a really bad day!
The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'
So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'
That's how the fight started....

Too funny

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Inside El Chapo's Home

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view slideshow here

US Cash, seized in the house was counted to be nearly $22 Billion! Take a look.

A Nightlight AND Outlet

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See video here
Purchase here

TURNkey Hall of Fame

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“We call this computer Gandalf...”

Never Throw out the Potato Peels
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3 Reasons Why You Should Roast Your Potato Peels
It only stands to reason that potato skins — long a staple of bars and tailgate parties — are delicious in just about any form. Even if they don't have much (or any) potato flesh left on them, the skins alone are full of potato goodness, and, once roasted, taste something like a potato chip or a French fry, but with even more flavor.
Here are three reasons why you should try this out.
1.      Because they are delicious. Plain and simple. Throw some potato peels in the oven, and they crisp up into delicious bites.
2.      No waste! It's delightful to take a food scrap that would have been thrown out or composted and find, instead, that it's not only worth saving, but really delicious.
3.      They are the perfect pre-dinner snack: If you're just now peeling potatoes, it means that dinner still has a little while to go before it's on the table. Since potato peels take a short amount of time to roast, you can give your guests or family an easy snack while you finish cooking. The roasted peels also are quite light and don't fill you up.
A hot, easy, delicious pre-dinner nibble that saves you from wasting space in the trash can? How much better does it get?

How to Roast Potato Peels

Here's how I roast potato peels. It's super simple. I've only roasted russet potato peelings (since that's what I use for mashed potatoes) but I think this would work with other potato varieties as well.
Two notes I would emphasize: Get these in the oven immediately after peeling your potatoes, as potato peels will quickly turn pink (which is nothing to worry about, but it does look strange); and if you leave them too long, they will get brown and mushy. Also, avoid any green peels; they may contain solanine, which is a toxin that is not (I repeat not) usually an issue in potatoes, since potatoes simply don't contain enough of it to bother most people. But small children can be more sensitive, and just to be on the safe side, I would discard any really green peels.
1.      Heat the oven to 400°F: Line a large baking sheet with a Silpat, if desired.
2.      Toss the peels with oil and seasonings: I used a light drizzle of olive oil, and some pepper and smoked salt. Toss so that the peels are thoroughly coated.
3.      Roast for 15 to 20 minutes, stirring once: Stir halfway through roasting, and remove them once they're done to your liking.
4.      Sprinkle with cheese and scallions! If you like you can sprinkle these little bites with cheese and green onions, or eat them straight off the baking sheet.
Eat immediately with ketchup, hot sauce, or some other delicious dip.

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