Thursday, November 30, 2017

Through the Keyhole - December 2017






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guess the location
     DECEMBER 2017 turnkey-color-logo-white 7
Through the Keyhole

Informative & Interesting... not your everyday company newsletter.
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Baby it's cold outside....
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Some people say that it's the most wonderful time of the year.  Some people say Bah, Humbug.  Which one are you?  Pictured above is in the Daley Center with the Christmas Market.  If you have not gone to see it in person, it is quite something...not like Rockefeller Center but nice.  Not bad for the Second City.

I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, and a Happy, Healthy and Prosperous New Year!

As we move into the Christmas Season, I want to point out once again some festive things to do as we enter the shortest days of the year (meaning daylight for those of you who are literal):

1) Ice Skating at the Bean (rink or ring)
2) Museums
3) Dining
4) Theater
5) Dive Bars
6) Get on a plane and get the heck out of here

And now for a new picture above- Can you guess where it is by looking "through the keyhole"? 
"4 of the top 10 classical composers in history were born here.  PEZ candy was invented here (incidentally to look like a cigarette lighter), and so was the snow globe.  This city was divided into four parts after WWII.  There is also a very famous Chicago company named for it (I think)."  Can you guess the location?

Correct answers will be given recognition but half the fun is trying to figure it out.  The correct answer will be revealed in the subsequent issue.  Good luck and have fun.

If you like this newsletter, forward it to someone else or sign them up HERE.

As always, send any items you think are newsworthy, interesting or just plain odd to news@turnkey.pro


Las Vegas, NV - Keyhole Answer


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"This place is home to so many hotel rooms that it would take 288 years for one person to spend a night in every room.  Famously home to entertainers, magicians, musicians and singers - the city never sleeps.  And you can still go downtown and get a shrimp cocktail for 99 cents."

Last month,
Mike Rathsack won the location by guessing correctly.  His answer - "The answer is the Neon Museum in Las Vegas - they did a show on this, I think as a segment of CBS Sunday Morning." I found the video here.  GREAT WORK!

Perhaps one of my favorite silly movies of all time is Vegas Vacation with good old Clark W. Griswold and family.  Nick Papagiorgio is actually Rusty Griswold's alias as he buys a fake ID and then proceeds to win at slots, craps and virtually anything he plays.  If you have not seen the movie or don't mind watching it again, it's great fun and shows what Las Vegas looked like before its explosive growth.  It is guaranteed to make you laugh.

Some other movies that showcase this City of Lights are Oceans 11, Casino, The Hangover, Leaving Las Vegas (depressing), Honeymoon in Vegas, Bugsy, 21, Jason Bourne, Rainman, and Swingers to name a few.

Las Vegas is not for families although they tried to market the city that way in the mid 90s.  Vegas is more like a town for adults both young and old with plenty of good and bad things to do. 

My first trip to Las Vegas was in 1990 when I was living in Los Angeles when things were really different.  Steak and Eggs were on special at every casino, drinks were free as long as you were close to a machine or table, the Dunes and Stardust ruled the strip and the first themed resort was opened by Steve Wynn - The Mirage. There was even a hint of the Mob still around...

Since then, Las Vegas (both on and off the strip) has exploded.  Themed hotels are the rule not the exception. Celebrity Chefs have invaded every part of the town, and it's very corporate earnings driven.  There are day clubs (that's right - clubs that are pool-centric and open during the day), roller coasters, moving walkways, a serviceable train system, and people EVERYWHERE.

Some fun facts:

There’s estimated to be at least 1,000 people living beneath Vegas in underground tunnels.

In 1980, a Las Vegas hospital had to suspend workers who were betting on when patients would die. One nurse was even accused of murdering a patient so she would win.

It would take 288 years for one person to spend one night in every hotel room in Las Vegas.

Contrary to popular belief, prostitution in Las Vegas is not legal.

Frederick W. Smith, the founder and CEO of FedEx, saved his company by gambling in Las Vegas. He took FedEx’s last $5,000 to Sin City and won $27,000 while gambling on blackjack, paying for the company’s $24,000 fuel bill.

The Las Vegas Strip is the brightest place on Earth when looked at from outer space.

15 of the world’s top 25 hotels are located in Las Vegas.

Las Vegas has a “black book,” a list of people who are banned from setting foot in any casino in the city.

In the 1970s, Liberace played at the Hilton for a salary of $300,000 a week

In some Asian cultures, the number 4 is thought be bad luck. For that reason, some hotels in Vegas have no floors that start with the number 4.

The electric bill for the Luxor pyramid’s shining light is $51 per hour.

See the pictures below.
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Get your teenager out of the shower...
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A shower head than changes color the longer you are in it...from green to blue to purple to red.  Not quite sure how it works but it's French so you get a free baguette with every purchase.

Check it out here


Police Stop Driver With Massive Tree On Top of Minivan.  (Is that the Griswolds?)
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see news story here (video)


2017 Hurricane Season in motion (interesting)

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This is an amazing simulation of the season.  Watch all of the action in the Caribbean and see the remarkable path of destruction to Ireland (remember Ophelia?)



"Mad Dog" Mattis REAL Quote of the month
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"There is only one retirement plan for terrorists."

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Things that were really said in court...
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ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
__________ __

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
____________

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
______________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
____________

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, very close to your IQ.
_______________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?
_______________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid.
_______________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I need a different attorney. Can I get a
new attorney?
_______________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
_______________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
__________ ___

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant
to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you
performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

_______________

ATTORNEY: ALL of your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you attend?
WITNESS: Oral.
__________ _____

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
__________ ____

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you
check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive,
nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law.      
 


Turn your SUV into a snowmobile
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Track N Go is the first ever ''wheel driven track system for pickup trucks''! This innovative and unique system opens the market to an easier utilization of track system in winter time.
check out this video of this $25K product that would be a must at the North Pole.


A Parade Comes to the Veterans Home and We Were There
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This is a really nice thing that the local radio station Big 95.5 (Country) did for a local Wheeling Veteran.  On Veteran's day, they brought the parade to Woody's home and that included Police / Fire Vehicles, a local Jeep club, several military vehicles, a tow truck or two and Prospect High School Marching Band (where was Wheeling?).  Thank you for your service!
article and video here



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The Haircut
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A teenage boy had just passed his driving test and inquired of his father as to when they could discuss his use of the car.

His father said he'd make a deal with his son, "You bring your grades up from a C to a B average, study your Bible a little and get your hair cut. Then we'll talk about the car."

The boy thought about that for a moment, decided he'd settle for the offer and they agreed on it.

After about six weeks his father said, "Son, you've brought your grades up and I've observed that you have been studying your Bible, but I'm disappointed you haven't had your hair cut."

The boy said, "You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that, and I've noticed in my studies of the Bible that Samson had long hair, John the Baptist had long hair, Moses had long hair, and there's even strong evidence that Jesus had long hair."

"Did you also notice that they all walked everywhere they went?"


Lightning. WOW!
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This is why you don't stand under trees during a storm...
video here


Amazing Christmas Can Can.
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video here
These people have far too much time on their hands...However, it sure beats the old Conway Farms Winter Wonderland in Vernon Hills (now closed).
Enjoy!


I'm Pretty Sure the ESPN announcer got canned
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warning strong language video here


Gotta love NYC...especially the Subway
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Mini Cinnies - Bite Sized Cinnamon Rolls
Recipe:
Ingredients
1 can of Pillsbury crescent rolls
4 T brown sugar
1 t cinnamon
1 T butter
1 T flour
1/2 C powdered sugar
2 t milk

Directions:
Use half of package at a time so the dough stays cold.
In a small bowl mix together a tablespoon of slightly melted butter, cinnamon, brown sugar, and flour. Open crescent rolls, take half of dough and separate at the vertical seams. Press the diagonal seams of dough together so that the dough is smooth. Spoon half of the cinnamon mixture onto dough, roll short side up then continue with the remaining dough. Cut 2 inch slices and place all the rolls on a cookie sheet. Bake at 350 degrees for 10 to 12 minutes.

When rolls have cooled, mix powdered sugar with  milk. Add more sugar/milk to get frosting to the consistency of your liking. Drizzle the sugar mixture over the rolls then let dry. 


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